Mistress - just the word itself imbibes negative impressions. Wives despise them and society looks down on them. Mistresses are associated with the word home wrecker with low morals. But if you really think about it, do they like being a mistress? Is that a choice they voluntarily choose or is it a written destiny? If there is such a thing as being "single-blessedness"- meaning people who are "blessed" or born to be single, is there such thing as "mistress-blessedness"? What kind of woman would chose to be a mistress in the first place? Being a mistress is never easy, so they say.
You cannot demand and you constantly settling for stolen moments and attention. But since you are the other woman and everybody hates you, you might as well excel in what you do. And you'd better be good in keeping yourself anonymous or you will be forever obtaining the mark of the Scarlet Letter. A perfect mistress is a lady who is an expert in handling her man and knows how to keep him and the relationship hidden- if you can't do both, then you are just a bimbo who likes to "do" somebody else's husband. What does it takes to be the perfect other woman, you ask.
The number one rule of being the perfect other woman is- know where you stand. This is the rule of the universe to have order-knowing your place- everything should be in its proper place and order-like the sun and the moon, the land and the sea. This means the other woman should never show affection in public to avoid scandal- scandal is worst than murder. Jesus was a victim of scandal, see what happened to him. So, if you don't want to be crucified- save your urges inside the bedroom. The difference between a mistress and a wife is- a mistress never believes every word his lover is saying; another decree in being the perfect other woman- never believe what your man is saying to you.
In general, men are liars. They are driven to say whatever it takes to get what they want. "You understand me more that's why I love you more than my wife."- Never let this enter your head. This is usually a defense mechanism of a philandering man to justify his guilt for having a you. Enjoy every moment when he is showering you with sweet nothings but be on top of it. A mistress should have an ally- and there's no better perfect ally than his lover's assistant or secretary. You should know how to have a rapport with his lover's secretary- for two main reasons- to keep tract of his lover and to cover-up for them.
The other woman always remembers that curiosity kills- especially if you are curious about the wife. It's tempting to see the person your lover chose to sleep at night even if he "doesn't lover her". Curiosity can become very insatiable and before you know it, you are face to face with the wife with a gun pointing in your head. There are so many orders that a perfect adulteress should do but I will leave you with this one- discreetness. Mistresses should be synonymous with being discreet. A perfect adulteress should never brag or talk about being a mistress, she should never bad mouth or get jealous with the wife, the other woman should never ask for money, she should not travel with her lover- meet him somewhere else instead and most importantly she should never complain.
Mistresses, yes we don't like the idea of them but they are also people whose only fault is being in love with the right person in the wrong time.
The author of this article Ruth Purple is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years.